Who knows how long the Devil Rays' Carl Crawford will be out for this piece of idiocy but this seems like a fitting time to look at other ridiculous injuries suffered by those great "athletes," those fine physical specimens known as baseball players:
Pitcher Adam Eaton stabbed himself in the stomach as he was using a knife to open a DVD wrapper.
Sammy Sosa was disabled after a violent sneeze caused back problems.
Reliever Larry Anderson strained a rib muscle jumping from the bench to join a brawl.
Shortstop Clint Barmes fell down some stairs and broke his collarbone. He was unable to break his fall because he was cradling a package of venison given to him from teammate Todd Helton.
Speedster Rickey Henderson allegedly missed several games in August due to frostbite.
Outfielder Ken Griffey Jr. missed a game after his cup slipped and pinched a testicle.
Outfielder Glenallen Hill received cuts over much of his body after he fell out of bed onto a glass table. He was having a nightmare about being covered in spiders.
Pitcher Rich Harden strained his shoulder turning off his alarm clock.
Hall of Fame pitcher Phil Niekro was injured while shaking hands.
Pitcher Doc Gooden missed a start when a teammate accidentally hit him with a golf club in the locker room.
Wade Boggs hurt his back putting on his cowboy boots.
Pitcher Mike Remlinger missed 15 days because he broke his left pinky in a clubhouse recliner.
John Smoltz burned his chest while ironing the shirt he was wearing.
Nolan Ryan missed a start after being bitten by a coyote.
Outfielder Vince Coleman missed the entire 1985 World Series after being rolled up in the tarp machine at Busch Stadium.
Hall of Famer George Brett broke a toe on a chair when he was running from the kitchen to the living room to see baseball on TV.
Future Hall of Famer Tony Gwynn missed several games because he smashed his finger in the door of his luxury car, on the way to the bank.
Pitcher Carlos Zambrano was diagnosed with carpal tunnel syndrome after spending as many as five hours daily on the Internet.
John Kruk has one testicle due to a gonad obliterating baseball pitch
I was surprised to find that no baseball player got injured while adjusting himself but who knows, maybe that's how Griffey went down for the count with a pinched testicle. As much as I love baseball and respect the men who play it, I've gotta say, they have to be the most fragile group of men in sports.
John Kruk actually had testicular cancer that was discovered after that incident. Padres pitcher Jake Peavy hurt his ribs during a pile up after winning the NL West last year and was destroyed in his first start against St. Louis.
I would say at least 50% of those were excuses though. Something illegal, immoral or against their contract happened and they looked for an excuse. Still a funny list though :)
Hmm...baseball. I wish you were a fan of combat sports, as your style is very entertaining and I would love to read your thoughts on mixed martial arts and the like.
HaHa, it's gettin hot out, so it shouldn't be too long before she goes UFC on some dumb bitch in the street after gettin stared at for too long. That Napoleon Complex she's got is dangerous :-)
Pitcher Adam Eaton stabbed himself in the stomach as he was using a knife to open a DVD wrapper.
Comments (8): Carl Crawford Throws Tantrum, Injures Knee
Anderson
June 2, 2006 3:50 PM
I now know more about John Kruk than my stomach can tolerate. The dude was gross enough when I thought he had 2 balls.
NFL Adam
June 2, 2006 4:35 PM
John Kruk actually had testicular cancer that was discovered after that incident. Padres pitcher Jake Peavy hurt his ribs during a pile up after winning the NL West last year and was destroyed in his first start against St. Louis.
Matt Geiger
June 2, 2006 7:42 PM
I would say at least 50% of those were excuses though. Something illegal, immoral or against their contract happened and they looked for an excuse. Still a funny list though :)
Mickey Winans
June 2, 2006 8:34 PM
Here's a new addition, Mo Rivera injured his back last night while putting on his fuckin shoes.
http://www.forbes.com/entrepreneurs/feeds/ap/2006/06/01/ap2788768.html
Erik
June 3, 2006 5:10 PM
Hmm...baseball. I wish you were a fan of combat sports, as your style is very entertaining and I would love to read your thoughts on mixed martial arts and the like.
Goldie
June 3, 2006 7:57 PM
I'm pretty surprised that she doesn't, Erik. She's the biggest boxing fan I know.. seems natural that MMA would interest her too.
Julius
June 4, 2006 12:17 AM
HaHa, it's gettin hot out, so it shouldn't be too long before she goes UFC on some dumb bitch in the street after gettin stared at for too long. That Napoleon Complex she's got is dangerous :-)
Erik
June 4, 2006 10:50 AM
Maybe we should start a petition then? Maybe she'll allow enthusiasts to submit guest articles on the subject. ;) I kid, of course.