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People Are Serious About Mourning BarbaroI was returning to the office from a run this morning when one of the secretaries told me that Barbaro had been euthanized. She was so affected by the news that she had to put down her cheese danish to relay the information: "Ohhhh Flash, did you hear the news? Barbaro, the racing horse, has passed away. He’s just fought SO much!"
After what was likely 2 and a half hours of reading "Barbaro=Elmer’s" e-mails and being mock offended, he berated the clones for taking such disgusting glee in the horse’s death. How dare they trample on the graves of champions? Sick freaks. Barbaro’s death broke Romey’s heart and for the clones to behave in a manner that he encourages and rewards every other day of the year was beyond him; he was ashamed. In order to hammer this point home, he crumpled e-mails loudly over the microphone. I'll be honest, I didn't see the animals line coming but I should have known better all the same. Just three weeks ago, this bloke called me a sociopath for bagging on the woman that died of water toxicity after trying (and failing) to win a Nintendo Wii for her kids. Lesson learned. "Oh but he fought so hard! He was so brave!" No, he wasn't! This isn't Disney. Barbaro made no conscious decision to survive. He didn't know that his body had betrayed him or that he was in a life-threatening situation anymore than he knew that he delivered a violent beatdown to the Kentucky Derby field. Calling him brave or determined does nothing but make people feel better about the agony he was forced to endure. It doesn't matter how many human qualities are uselessly bestowed on him, at the end of the day, he's an animal that brought little to the table beyond an exhilarating 2 minutes followed by windfalls for the lucky. And for that (and the possibility of selling his ridiculously priced sperm), he had to suffer for eight months while the media and soccer moms with bedazzlers shoveled garbage about his valiant fight down our throats.  Posted at January 29, 2007 4:33 PM Permalink • Filed under: Racing & Cycling |
What? Too soon? My ticket to hell has already been stamped. Frankly, I had nothing to lose. Anyway, I was in another person’s office about an hour later when Jim Rome started freaking out about the issue on the radio.
Comments (16): People Are Serious About Mourning Barbaro
Hadrian
January 29, 2007 7:12 PM
My mom actually sent me an email about this earlier today and couldn't believe that such a "majestic animal" had to die. With the media already tired of two African Americans in the Super Bowl and Peyton vs. Rex, they're gonna be all over this for three more weeks.
liz
January 29, 2007 8:21 PM
it's a good thing barbaro isn't a human being.. politicians and pharma companies would have worked tirelessly to keep him living in pain for another 10 or 20 years!
AJ
January 29, 2007 9:13 PM
It's about fucking time. Hopefully they got all the pricey jizz they could out of him.
Matt
January 29, 2007 10:11 PM
In advance, I am not an expert. But many horse racing competitions require the horses to be conceived as God intended; that is, eugenics through horses actually gettin' it on. So his foul foal-former wouldn't be worth anything in those cases. I am not sure if that applies to the triple crown races, but considering how much money they spent trying to keep him alive it wouldn't surprise me if it did.
Again though, I could be way off.
Brendan
January 30, 2007 12:22 AM
You make a good point. If they don't apply human traits to him, it becomes much more obvious that he suffered 8 months for no reason at all.
But my real question is - where was PETA through all of this? Isn't this type of thing right up their alley?
Nixon
January 30, 2007 8:19 AM
Actually, it looks like PETA wasn't (and isn't) happy about Barbaro and horse racing in general:
http://www.peta.org/campaigns/barbaro.asp
"PETA is campaigning to get the Breeders' Cup's 2-year-old juvenile race, which is particularly harmful to young horses, canceled; many horses who have won that race have been forced to run injured or became “broken down” within the following year. Please call 1-800-RACE-CUP to voice your objections to this cruel event."
Mickey Winans
January 30, 2007 11:14 AM
You're crazy Flash. Without Barbaro, people couldn't start up scholarships in his honor. Look how he's changing lives!!!
A Florida race track is honoring Barbaro by establishing a scholarship in his name.
Officials say the award will be worth at least $20,000 and will go to high school students planning to study veterinary medicine at the University of Florida.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070130/ap_on_sp_ot/barbaro_scholarship
Tree
January 30, 2007 12:21 PM
Simply brilliant, people wanted him to recover so he might again have the chance to get beaten by a tiny Mexican with a stick.
Oh Barbaro you majestic bastard, never again will you be able to have some hombre pequeno kick you in the ribs as he whips your ass. And when your owner gets millions, you get some carrotts.
So sleep well young prince, hopefully Herve Villachaize doesn't live on your street in heaven.
Anthony
January 30, 2007 3:54 PM
Tattoo wasn't even big enough to be the tiny Mexican. He'll end up being the stick.
Mark Harold
January 30, 2007 5:07 PM
Apparently you missed the fucktard on ESPN who said that Barbaro's death "affirmed our humanity." Anybody feeling more affirmed around here?
Tree
January 30, 2007 6:36 PM
What it affirms is my dissapointment in humanity as a whole.
If that bastage couldn't run fast the only time I would be thinking about him is when I lick an envelope.
How long before they come out with Barbar-O's for the little fuckers to eat every morning? Or they could just get a little bit closer to the real deal and eat a can of dog food. "I Love Barbaro....HE'S DELICIOUS!"
Erik
January 30, 2007 10:32 PM
I'd be more likely to swerve my car into a person to avoid hitting a horse, if forced to make the choice. After all, latest population estimates indicate that there are far more people than horses on this planet. Of course, looking at it that way probably makes me a bad person. You're my boy, Barbaro!
Tree
January 31, 2007 12:09 AM
Hell yeah I'd hit a person before a horse, you nail a 500lb horse, there is real good chance you are done. Whack some 160 pounder picking up his morning paper and you walk away. Sorry for your luck Mr. Smith, but I gotta play the odds.
It's not that I am anti-animal, I am just against people getting all emotional for an animal that all it did was run fast while getting its ass whipped.
Matt
January 31, 2007 6:10 AM
Quite the controversial stance, Tree
Tree
January 31, 2007 8:26 PM
Eh, controversial in that if it is between my life or some random guy, I'm looking out for #1.
Toxic
February 1, 2007 7:15 AM
Horses, fucking hate them, thick as shit, just below sheep on the tard scale.
OK I may be a bit biased having only backed two winners in the National over the years and that bastard that bolted with me on it's back but still..