In what is the dumbest bull I’ve read this weekend, women are now commandeering bedrooms, nooks, and even closets to create Mom Caves. It sounds like MILF porn, doesn’t it? Mom Caves II: Leave It to Cleavage. Mom Caves VI: Carnal Casserole. But alas, it’s nothing of the sort (not yet, at least).
Mom Caves allow women to escape their spouses and families so they can relax and enjoy personal pursuits such as knitting, scrapbooking, reading, and talking on the phone. Like the man cave, it is a space all their own. But instead of beer cans, recliners, and sports posters, there are incense burners, chaise lounges, and obnoxious decor vomited out of an IKEA catalog.
According to Elaine Griffin, New York City interior designer and author of “Design Rules: The Insider’s Guide to Becoming Your Own Decorator”, Mom Caves sprang up after women could no longer utilise the kitchen for alone time because it had become a social setting. No, seriously, she said that.
“It’s different from the quintessential ‘man cave,’ where men do manly, messy and sporty things, often involving a recliner. Mom Caves are fun, frankly feminine spaces, and they’re personalized.”
Here’s what you need for your Mom Cave: a place to sit, storage space, an area to do what you want to do, and room for occasional visitors. No extra rooms available? Turn a stair landing into a mini-sanctuary using narrow console tables, a luxurious rug, and a couple of armchairs.
I have a mom cave. It’s called my fucking house. Maybe my bloke and I are crazy but when either of us want to be left alone for whatever reason, we say so and the matter is settled. There are no rows or passive aggressive battles, and no one’s feelings are hurt. If his mates are over to play poker or watch the All Blacks, they aren’t relegated to a basement oasis of masculinity, and I don’t have to retreat to a sad, fuchsia and lime green coloured nook where I can knit the baby’s afghan in peace.
This gender-specific, man cave/mom cave bullshit does nothing but breed dysfunction. If he and I ever reach a point where we need designated rooms to get away from each other for hours at a time, he’ll need to take all of his sanctuary ideas and use them to decorate his new single man flat.